A Dish Worth Fighting Over

There aren't many dishes that are worth fighting over. Usually if your S.O. and you both crave something you just get two (or three!). After all this is the land of plenty. If you're both have a crush on meat-lover's pizza then you just get a bigger one. If you get into a race to inhale the appetizers you begrudgingly decided to split, you can still keep the peace by grabbing a pen & napkin and visibly adding up the total number of calories in your date's 22 oz. sirloin and baked potato. If he/she doesn't take notice and stop hovering over the plate, then casually ask them to check your math. That will force them to use at least one hand while you get busy with both. If, halfway through your entreé, you fret that you might not end up completely bloated by the end of the feast, you can try to steal some bites from your dinner partner when they aren't looking. "Oh, look, over behind you, way back in the back by that family with the kid that won't shut up. There's your old high school ___friend!" is always good for a crank-around that will last at least 30 seconds. Enough time to scoop up a dollop of mashed potatoes and still resculpt them so as not to get caught. Or, in an emergency situation, you can always start talking about swimsuits in the middle of dinner. That will usually get you at least a few bites of their meat (no pun intended). Of course, if you are a dude then you'll probably end up being tortured for the next day or two by the "Does this make my butt look fat?" line of interrogation, so only use if it's an emergency. When it comes to dessert, however, things get a bit more complicated. Unless you order the entire cheese cake, most desserts aren't big enough to split with someone else. And, most of the time, after pigging out on an American meal, no one feels justified ordering two, so they decide to split one. Still, most of the time that works out ok. Usually after a big meal you're so coma-fied that you just don't have it in you to fight over any of the desserts that the nation's chain restaurants have conjured up in their labs. However, if you've ever decide to split the Bread Pudding dessert at Cafe Lou Lou,...Read more