A teensy weensy confessional never hurt a soul.
At one point during the full flowering of my partying life during the early 1980s (as synonymous with my early twenties), I was banned from two New Albany bars for rowdy behavior — and it might have been three if not for a case of mistaken identity that worked in my favor.
That other guy never forgave me.
Loud, profane, obnoxious? Guilty. Vandalizing the salt shaker? Well, that was a bum rap, but when your reputation precedes you (shrug). The central point is that I was a bad boy, and my pleas generally came flavored nolo contendere, although eventually we all kissed and made up.
More importantly, I grew up.
Decades later, as my dotage approaches with a speed commonly attributed to Japanese bullet trains, those halcyon days of peak youthful exuberance now are as obsolete as rotary dial phones, which might be why last week’s news that two Louisville bars intend to establish “30 and over” age restrictions did not produce even a sliver of righteous indignation, as it might have in 1985 (when I was 25).
I merely nodded in agreement, and the outline of a rueful smile appeared. Having recently experienced an instance of ageism in employment, it seems to me ironically fitting that for a change, the young pups might periodically feel the sting of this most unpleasant of lashes.
After all, surely this proposed barrier of 30-years will help to make them better people, more responsible citizens, and perhaps more likely not to vomit in the urinal.
—
As an extension and an aside, the next phase of my career in beer is taking shape.
It involves borrowing the founding concept of the AARP, or maybe Elder Hostel, and applying it to the world of better beer: 50 and over only.
My rationale is that while a youthful clientele ultimately is necessary to replenish an establishment’s stock of regulars, it is the older customers who are more loyal to situations, concepts and the bar stools they prefer. They’re less noisy and usually unwilling (or unable) to break things or start fights.
Best of all, they have disposable income and can be persuaded to part with it if the milieu being offered is comfortable — and open in the afternoon, because we like day drinking very much.
Specifically, I propose a quiet day or night, at least one per week at good beer establishments. This means no live or canned music is...Read more
